first time mom Archives - Sunshine and Holly

I’d Rather Be a Lazy Mom than an Angry Mom

By sunshineandholly on March 1, 2022

I’d Rather Be a Lazy Mom than an Angry Mom

I always knew I wanted to be a mom. It was the one thing I knew for sure that I was going to do once I was an adult. And like most people without kids, I knew I was going to be the best mom ever. I had super high expectations for myself and I’ll admit, I was a little judgemental towards other parents that didn’t do things the way that I thought was best.

But after having 2 kids in 2 years, I quickly realized that I wasn’t going to live up to my unreasonable expectations. Trying to do it all was slowly driving me crazy. I was angry all the time. Angry at myself for not living up to my expectations, angry at my kids for being so needy, angry at my husband for not being home to help out. I knew I was going to have to let some things go.

But I had a really hard time with the guilt of not being able to do it all. And to be honest, I still struggle so much with the (completely unjustified) shame I feel when I think about everything I *should* be doing. (I know, I know – it’s silly. I know I’m a great mom. It’s that perfectionist side of me coming out!) The hard lesson I had to learn is that no matter what expectations you put on yourself for motherhood, moms are still human. We still have our own needs and wants, past trauma and baggage, flaws and shortcomings. We want what’s best for our kids, but we can’t destroy ourselves in order to give them the best. Because first and foremost, our kids need a mom. A mentally healthy, present, caring mom.

I knew I had to start letting some things go that in the grand scheme of things, weren’t that important. And I received some judgment. I’m sure some people thought I was just being lazy. But I would rather be a lazy mom than an angry mom. And if skipping out on some small things gave me the energy and mental capacity to be able to handle the important stuff, that was the way things were going to be for our family.

What things have you had to let go to keep your sanity during the last few years?

I'd Rather Be a Lazy Mom than an Angry Mom | sunshineandholly.com

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family | food | motherhood | parenting | recipe

Super Simple Kid-Friendly Vegetable Side Dishes for Weeknight Dinners

By sunshineandholly on April 16, 2019

When I was a newlywed, I LOVED to meal plan. There was nothing better than going through cookbooks and magazines and searching online for yummy recipes to try. (Thank goodness Pinterest wasn’t around back then – I would have spent way too many hours pinning a million recipes!)

But the novelty of meal planning wore off, especially after having kids. I hate spending all that time picking out recipes, shopping, and cooking, only to have my kids turn up their noses at what I’ve prepared. #momlife

These days I do my best to meal plan, but there are many nights where I still stand in front of the open fridge, looking for inspiration when I haven’t prepared ahead of time. But typically I have a meat and vegetable side dish planned for each night. I like to keep the side dish simple and easy – the less chopping, cooking, or dirtying up pans, the better!

Here are a few super simple kid-friendly vegetable side dishes for weeknight dinners:

A Letter to Me Before You

By sunshineandholly on March 21, 2019

Motherhood changes you. The person I was before I had children doesn’t exist anymore. I’ve been molded by my experiences, shaped into something new. Each day of pregnancy, each milestone of infancy, each moment of motherhood has carved and chiseled and scraped and sculpted me into who I am today.

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family | motherhood | parenting

5 Ways to Help Your Toddler Handle Anger (Plus a Free Printable!)

By sunshineandholly on January 30, 2019

This post may contain affiliate links. Purchasing through them helps support this website. (Click the pictures to shop the links!)

Toddlers are a rare breed. All of a sudden, your sweet little baby realizes they have the power to make choices. And once they realize that, they start testing that power. Over and over and over, all day long…

Opinions, emotions, and tantrums, oh my!

The Number One Thing I Wish I Had Done When My Baby Was Born

By sunshineandholly on January 23, 2019

The Number One Thing I Wish I Had Done When My Baby Was Born

This post was sponsored by Eli Supplemental Newborn Screening, but all thoughts and opinions are my own.

Becoming a mom was one of the biggest, most life-changing events of my life so far. All of a sudden, I was 100% responsible for another person. There were so many things to think about and plan, and all the decisions and choices regarding this new tiny life were up to me. It was, and still is, incredibly overwhelming! After all, all moms want to make the right choices for their babies. You do all the research you can – you read the books, talk to other moms, and listen to your pediatrician. But ultimately, each decision is up to you.

When I had my first baby, I relied heavily on the advice of those around me, but honestly didn’t do much outside research of my own. When I was pregnant with my second child, I knew better and decided to really look into my options on lots of topics like birth, breastfeeding, and sleep training. But one thing I didn’t even think to look at was the type of screening available for newborns for treatable diseases.

Thankfully, both of my children were healthy. But thinking back, I really wish I had done my research. I didn’t realize that pediatricians don’t test for all of the possible conditions that may affect newborns. Conditions that are treatable if they’re caught early on. Most states screen for the conditions on the federal government’s “Recommended Uniform Screening Panel.” But there are up to 32 other possible conditions that can be treated if they’re caught early enough. Even if you had extensive prenatal screening.

Luckily, there’s Eli.

Eli is a newborn screening service that screens for an additional 32 treatable conditions and risks. Eli is at the forefront of newborn screening technology to provide accurate and reliable screening results for additional treatable conditions. The process is simple – just order your kit before your due date, bring the kit to your newborn’s first pediatric visit (where your doctor or nurse will collect the required samples), ship the samples back, and receive the results in a week. You’ll have all the information you need to make informed decisions about the health of your newborn. You can worry less, and focus more on the joy that comes with having a sweet new little baby. Eli also offers genetic counselors to answer questions and help guide care so your baby will have the happiest, healthiest start!

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