Move Over Regina George, My Three-Year-Old is a Mean Girl

We all know toddlers are tough. The “terrible twos” and “threenagers” can have even the most patient and calm mama pulling out her hair.  My son, especially, was a defiant, manipulative, and aggressive two-year-old. And those were his good traits! (I’m kidding. He was difficult, but he’s now the sweetest preschooler you’ll ever meet.)

My daughter was still sweet when she was two. The “terrible twos” didn’t apply to her. Yes, she had her fair share of tantrums. But all-in-all, she was still cute and cuddly.

But now that she’s three? Holy cow! Move over Regina George, my three-year-old is a mean girl! Don’t be fooled – she may seem like your typical, sassy three-year-old, but in reality, she’s so much more than that. She’s the queen bee – the star, and the rest of us are just her little workers.

Luckily, my daughter is still super cute.  So I guess I’ll keep her around. But, of course, any time I tell her she’s cute or that she’s being a sweet girl, she looks at me, judging and thinking, “Why are you so obsessed with me?”

She recently gave up naps. I tried to push them for a while, because by bedtime, she was acting crazy tired. But after a few days of her looking at me with that sassy look that seemed to say, “Mama, quit trying to make naps happen. It’s not going to happen!” I gave up on the naps.

Luckily she doesn’t know how to read and write, because I would totally be in her burn book. My page would read, “My mama is a pusher. A sad old nap pusher!”

Here are some other reasons my three-year-old is a mean girl:

She wears pink on Wednesdays.

And every other day. And don’t forget her tiara. 

She has her own entourage.

Just like Regina had the plastics. Maddie has the plushies.

She stabs me in the back.

Must be something to do with all those episodes of Dexter I binge-watched while I was pregnant with her.

She spreads lies.

No, I didn’t say you could have cookies and ice cream for lunch.

She walks all over people.

Literally. She thinks I’m a playground.

She’s a bully.

She teases me, calls me names, and threatens me. Good thing she’s only 3 feet tall or I might actually be a little scared of her.

So how many of you have felt personally victimized by your three-year-old? Well, just know you’re not alone.  They can be mean.

At least they’re cute!