Google-Killer…Drinking the Kool-Aid…what the hell?

Oh business clichés. How those executives love to use you. Check some out:

I started thinking about these the other day when I happened to say out loud to someone, “I haven’t had a chance to connect with him since he left, but when I do, I’ll make sure to ask him for you.” …really Holly? “Connect with him?” I should have just said, “I haven’t talked to him since he left.” But since I have now been working in the corporate world for 2 full years (yes, this past Wednesday was my 2 year anniversary with the corporate office of the “unnamed attraction.” Happy anniversary to me!) I find myself using those terrible business phrase clichés way too much. I guess the phrase “Connect with him” isn’t THAT bad. But the feminist in me grits my teeth every time I hear some executive say, “He dropped the ball on this one!” or “Make sure you bring your A game” or “Give me a ballpark figure” or “Let’s touch base later.” Sports related business phrases really should be outlawed. There are also some really annoying words I hear quite often such as “synergy” and “blue-sky.” And then there are the phrases where I just want to stop the executive and say “Wait. What the HELL are you talking about?!”

But I do want to list some phrases that CRACK me up. I found all of these on the above websites. Unfortunately, I’ve never heard anyone I work with say any of these phrases. I wish they would though…you can be sure that I will laugh out loud and probably get funny looks from everyone in the conference room. 🙂

“Putting lipstick on a pig” – Do Miss Piggy and Kermit work here?
“Low hanging fruit” – Sounds like something a middle school aged boy would laugh at.
“Best of breed” – Woof Woof!
“Run it up the flag pole and see who salutes” – Run this up your flag pole!
“Polishing a turd” – really…really?!?!
“Rubber hits the road” – Wait, are we talking about work or prophylactics?
“Purple cow” – All of these business phrases sure are purple cows. 🙂

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